Minneapolis resident Laura Davis never had any interest in watching “The Bachelor” or its various spin-offs. However, she decided to give “The Golden Bachelor” a chance, a show that featured contestants with hearing aids. Davis, who has been single for a long time, found the show to be silly and unconventional. Surprisingly, it also sparked some inspiration within her. She began to consider the possibility of reentering the dating scene after being alone for so many years.
Her hope did not originate from Gerry Turner, the emotional 72-year-old widower at the center of the reality TV show. It came from the women. Those daring, darling women, some of whom “didn’t think they would ever be able to actually have feelings for a man again,” said Davis, who was briefly married in the ’80s. She watched as they fell in love.
“The show – as silly as it was, as unrealistic as it was – shows that it is possible.”
The popular ABC-TV reality series, which concluded last week with the live broadcast of Turner’s wedding to 70-year-old widow Theresa Nist, has sparked conversations about the love lives of older adults, about what it means to pursue sex, romance, and marriage in your 60s and 70s. It has also reignited a few of those love lives.
The television show is airing at a time when more seniors are single. According to a 2020 Pew Research survey, approximately half of women over 65 are not in a relationship, partly due to men having a shorter life expectancy. Divorce rates among older Americans are also increasing.
The matchmaking service It’s Just Lunch Minneapolis hasn’t seen an increase in memberships that can be attributed to “The Golden Bachelor.” However, the show has sparked conversations among several new female clients, according to Natalie Fry, membership director and matchmaker. She stated, “It was just the little push they needed to believe they could still put themselves out there.”
In many ways, “The Golden Bachelor” closely follows the format of the two-decade-old shows “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette,” with its glamorous dates and engagement ring. However, the contestants on “The Golden Bachelor” also touch on real issues of family, memory, and loss.
During one episode, the women dressed up in silly outfits for a photo shoot, a typical “Bachelor” group date. Nancy Hulkower, a widow, became emotional when she wore a white wedding dress for the first time in decades. Turner checked in with her, and they connected over the unexpected ways grief can affect individuals.
The date was “silly,” but the emotions were genuine, said Julie Pfitzinger, managing editor of Next Avenue, a nonprofit publication focused on aging in America. “I think that’s where I was like, OK, I get this show, now.”
Pfitzinger wishes the series had delved more intentionally into the topics raised in some of the one-on-one conversations. How do we manage blending families? How do we combine finances, or not? What if one of us gets cancer?
“That’s the reality of a relationship when you’re 70 and older,” said Pfitzinger, whose husband died in July at age 65. “It’s not all dancing in the diner.”
More than four years ago, Michele Arnoldy’s husband, a war veteran, died by suicide. Arnoldy, a life coach and former trauma nurse, healed herself through psychotherapy, writing, and faith. Now, at age 66, she’s ready to sell the house and start a new chapter. To find love again.
When she heard that “The Bachelor” was casting women in their 60s and 70s, she applied.
This spinoff showed that “in your 60s and 70s, you still want the same things,” Arnoldy said. “People label seniors as something they really aren’t. We still need affection. We still like sex…
“I think it opened people’s eyes.”
But she wishes the show had portrayed the women as more mature and less giddy. She believes this was partly because the producers, who interview the cast on camera, are much younger. As
